


Isn't Lance Good Enough?

by The_Defender (The_Optimist)



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, Crying, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt Lance (Voltron), Hurt/Comfort, I'm sorry my son, Space Dad Shiro (Voltron), Team as Family, bathroom crying, inspired by an image that is linked to in the notes, it's just really sad in general tbh, marked teen for swearing, throwing things in a fit of sad rage
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-21
Updated: 2016-08-21
Packaged: 2018-08-10 05:47:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,142
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7832698
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Optimist/pseuds/The_Defender
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Lance has been trying to one up Keith since he met him. Keith didn't even remember his name. His pride wasn't the only thing injured that day, and it has been building up for a long, long time.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Isn't Lance Good Enough?

**Author's Note:**

> Inpired by this (http://alienowlprince.tumblr.com/post/149255357619/why-cant-i-just-be-lance-for-once-dont) wonderful art! Please check it out, it's amazing. I'm pretty sure this will be a one shot but idk yet.

Lance dropped his jacket on the floor as the door _swooshed_ shut behind him.

  
With a sigh, Lance dropped down onto his bed, limbs sprawled and throat tight as he stared at the ceiling. "Fuck." He whispered, the word catching as it came up, and Lance curled up on the mattress. He lay there, breathing as slowly as he dared, watching nothing as he tried to still the thoughts in his head. _Good for nothing... You were only meant to be a cargo pilot... You're gonna get us all killed one day Lance... At least Keith was there..._

  
Lance shook his head, tears rising unbidden to his eyes as he struggled to keep his breathing slow. It caught in his throat as he heard footsteps, bright voices and friendly sounds passing his door on their way to dinner, but not one stopped to call him. 'They probably just don't know I'm in my room...' Lance thought, listening as they walked away. _You know that's not true. You said you were tired. You said you would be in your room. They know you're here but they don't care to check on you, don't want you to sit with them, how could someone eat next to your mess? They much prefer Keith's company..._

  
A hiss of pain escaped Lance's throat, and he curled in tighter on himself. "Stop. Stop, please. They need me. They can't form Voltron without me." He whispered into the quiet of his room, tears slowly falling down his cheeks and breath ragged. _They replaced the Blue Paladin before. Why not again? They don't need you, just your armour. You just fill a shell, and you. Are. Replaceable._

  
With a scream, Lance threw himself out of bed, hurling his pillow at the wall, crying out as he pulled everything from his bed, throwing everything non-breakable in his possession as hard as he could at whatever he could. After a few minutes, his cries faded, and he fell to his knees in the middle of the room. Tears fell slowly, and he watched his hands shake. "Why can't I just be Lance for once?" He couldn't control the shake that spread from his hands, to his shoulders, everywhere it could reach before he shook uncontrollably, sobs breaking from him as he knelt on the floor.

  
After a while, the tears slowed and his breath came more evenly. His face and eyes burned, and his face was wet all over. Lance felt disgusting, and shakily stood to clean himself off. "Idiot." He hissed to himself as he pressed his ear to the door. He waited a few seconds, but he couldn't hear anyone coming, so slowly slid his door open. He glanced around quickly, but saw no one. He practically ran down the corridor, trying to be as quiet as he could, and quickly reached the communal washroom just a few doors down from his own room. Stepping inside, he made his way to the sink, sighing at how ugly he looked in the mirror. _I bet Keith could even make crying look good._

  
Sighing, Lance turned to get some tissues, leaving his back to the door. Just before he turned back to the sink, however, his heart plummeted at a familiar noise. _Swoosh_. "Hey, Lance, we didn't see you at dinner."

  
Lance was frozen. Shiro was stood behind him, unaware, but blocking Lance's only exit. "Yeah, I... I took a nap?" He cursed his shaking voice, with the obvious raspiness that spoke volumes about what he had just spent dinner doing.

  
"Oh, okay. Well, I guess you shouldn't miss breakfast then, huh?" Shiro had moved over to the sinks, and appeared to be brushing his teeth from what Lance could see from the corner of his eye.  
"What are doing?" Shiro eventually asked after watching Lance stand as still as possible, facing the tissue dispenser in he corner. 'Quiznak.' Thought Lance, glancing around to try and take inspiration and to find an escape route. "Lance?" Shiro asked again, worried.

  
"Shit." Lance spoke under his breath, realising he was well and truly stuck in the bathroom with Shiro. With his luck, Lance knew his face would still be covered in snot and tears.

  
"Lance." A firm hand landed on his shoulder, and Lance flinched, head ducking down to his shoulder to hide it from Shiro's searching gaze. "What's wrong?" Shiro asked softly, his quiet voice carrying in the empty space between them. Lance's lower lip wobbled at the warm, familial tone. Oh how he missed home. "Lance please." Shiro was beginning to sound slightly stressed, his concern seeming to rise every second Lance was silent. The guilt from doing this to Shiro simply because he didn't want him to know he was crying over a failed training exercise was slowly eating him alive.

  
"I'm sorry." Lance whispered, eyes welling up as Shiro softly squeezed his shoulder.

  
"Whatever it is you've done, you don't need to apologise to me. We can fix it." Shiro spoke soothingly, and the dam inside Lance broke. _You can't fix me Lance. The truth is unchangeable_.

"Shiro!" Lance cried out, turning and wrapping himself around the older man, sobbing into his shoulder as his human and Galra arms both wrapped tightly around his back, the former rubbing gentle circles into his back. "I hate it, I hate it, Shiro please make it stop. Make them stop. I can't take it anymore!" Lance cried, and Shiro's breath hitched as well.

  
"Lance, Lance I don't understand? Who's hurting you? Please?" Shiro asked, his lips moving in Lance's hair.

  
"The people. The people at the Academy had voice and words and they _hurt_  Shiro, I'm only a pilot because Keith dropped out, I'm only a Paladin because Keith led us here, I'm only on the God damn team because of bloody Keith! It's not even his fault! It's mine! I can't do anything to be anywhere as near as good as him and _everyone_  knows it!" Lance sobbed desperately into Shiro's shoulder, missing Earth, missing him mama, but most of all missing a time before Keith.

  
There was a few seconds of tense silence filled only with Lance's crying and sniffling before Shiro spoke again. "Oh Lance," he whispered, pulling Lance away ever so slightly to look into his eyes, "you are so worthy of your position here. It was you who piloted the blue lion to the castle, it was you who brought us here. Keith is a good pilot, and he is a good fighter, but you are a good team mate, you are good friend, and we all trust you with our lives. Never doubt how much we need you." Shiro and Lance watched each other silently, Lance's breath slowing, and both their eyes watery.

  
"Okay." Lance answered, and gave a small smile.

  
"Okay." Shiro confirmed, and smiled back.


End file.
